This is a warning for anyone who suffers from Arachnophobia like my pinky D. If you have a fear of big black hairy spiders, do not, I stress, do not proceed.
Ok, now that I have made myself clear I want to tell you a very very scary story. It also happens to be true. Are you sitting down?? I'll begin then shall I.
On Christmas Eve D was making her famous flourless chocolate cake which she makes every Christmas for her family. D's mum was visiting at the time and was sitting on a chair watching telly (this is the scary part) Out of the corner of D's eye she sees something moving.............................
It was the biggest, scariest, blackest FUNNEL WEB SPIDER in the history of Australia and it was walking across the living room towards my nonna. Now D is very arachnophobic and goes into instant panic. She acts quickly and throws a rug over it and then panics some more. What if it gets really really cranky and tries to attack.
Let me explain something about funnel webs just incase you weren't aware..... They're just one of the deadliest spiders on the planet.....ahhhhhhhhhh
D tells her mum to move it and quick!! D's mum doesn't move quick enough. You see she needs a walker to help her walk. D says, 'forget the walker, quick, move over to the otherside of the room'. My Nonna doesn't argue. D suggests she hides in the bathroom.
While all this was happening we were out on a walk with B. D's state of health was getting worse by the minute. She was beginning to feel very sick. Then she heard the gingling of our collars....."B, there's a huge funnel web in there...whaaa whaaa whaaa". She then runs and hides in the bathroom.
B took a glass and piece of cardboard, traps the funnel web and takes it across the street to Walter's house who is holidaying in England.
Now D is constantly on the lookout for more funnel webs. We've found 4 inside our house in 8 years so even though they are common, they tend to stay in the garden. Bites are dangerous and can cause serious illness or death. The venom appears to particularly affect primates (ie humans), whereas other mammals - such as cats and dogs - are relatively resistant. 
I Noah had to stand on the glass to stop the spider from getting out........ok that part isn't true.
Now if you ever come to Australia for a holiday and you happen to be bitten by one of these deadly beasts, fear not as every hospital has antivenom plus they're only found around Sydney and the east coast including the Blue Mts.
Ok, you can go change your pants now.
tailwags
Noah x
